it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
there was a trapeze. enough said
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
