Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
