Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
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