Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
i barfeds in our rink
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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