who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize
