that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Randomize