You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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