non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
