remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Randomize
