Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
Randomize
