I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
