I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
