I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
