She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
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