I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Randomize
