i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
Randomize
