The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
