Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Randomize