im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
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