Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize