okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
We had sex on a dog bed..
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Randomize