I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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