I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize
