What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
