We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
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