Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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