i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
