I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize