no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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