Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Randomize
