Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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