Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
Randomize
