I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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