isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
