is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
cat food counts as protein by the way
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize