how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Randomize
