I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
