i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
Randomize