Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
oh god the rape fog is back!
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
