That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
