I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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