You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
