Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
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