i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Randomize
