But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
