so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
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