I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Randomize