Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Randomize
