I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Randomize
