Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize
