You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Randomize
